I had the honor of attending the wedding reception for my cousin Benjamin and his wife, Esty, a few years ago. He was the only one of my cousins to enter into a good, old-fashioned arranged marriage. I'll admit to being equal parts curious about how this was all working out and grateful to have something happy to celebrate. And so, with two of my adult children, we made the trek from Sacramento to Los Angeles to be a part of the festivities.
We all liked Esty instantly. She's one of those people who makes you feel that she's interested in you. It was obvious that whoever had decided that these two should be a match really knew his stuff.
As we sat visiting and catching up with family news, Benjamin stood and got everyone's attention. He wanted to introduce his wife (our newest cousin) to us so that we could see her through his eyes.
That was several years ago, and Benjamin's words have stayed with me.
At the end of every day, Benjamin said, before she goes to bed, Esty thinks through her day and makes sure she has done a mitzvah. He was referring to the modern, colloquial definition of mitzvah, "a good deed." Because she'd made this a part of her life, the essence of her inner being, she needn't worry about disappointing herself. She could go to sleep at night feeling content.
A mitzvah. It doesn't have to be anything huge or monumental. Just something. Phoning a friend who's feeling down, thanking a veteran for his service, donating to a worthwhile cause, or perhaps visiting an elderly neighbor who could use some company.
What a great way to end the day!! It must be very comforting to Esty to fall asleep with that thought every night, way more pleasant, anyway, than counting sheep or ruing an overloaded to-do list.
Benjamin entreated us, his friends and relatives, to follow Esty's lead by doing our own daily mitzvot. Planting that idea was his gift to us to celebrate his marriage.
Although I've made a point to follow Benjamin's encouragement, I'm not quite there yet with the same confidence. Sometimes I get so caught up in my own day and my own schedule that I forget to reflect about whether I've done my daily mitzvah.
Perhaps my mitzvah for today could be to launch a mitzvah brigade. I entreat you all to do a good deed today. Anything!! And tonight, when you go to bed and reflect over your day, you, too, can have the comfort of knowing that you've done your daily mitzvah.
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